I wouldn't have bought the hd extreme 3d, but thats your choice. I think the problem you are having is that it is actually too recent of a blackmagic card. The intensity pro has been around long enough that the older firmwares come with the original media express (its a simple purple window with a capture tab and a playback tab, but no master tab). I find that when you set the default resolution setting using this version of media express it gets saved in the way xsplit uses, so the changes you make in the older media express will transfer over when you close it and start xsplit.
It looks like decklink version 7.3.2 uses the older media express so its worth a shothttp://blackmagic-design.com/support/de ... &fid=10614
Make sure to fully uninstall all blackmagic products including the newer firmware and the newer media express before installing 7.3.2.
After you do that, and if it works with your newer extreme 3d card, then right click on a media express shortcut, hit properties, go to compatibility tab, check run with adminitrator privileges. do this again with xsplit. then open media express, preferences, set the resolution to ntsc, save quit. then open it up again, set the resolution to 720p 59.94, save close. If your ps3 is on and it is already set to 720p on component, the image should appear in media express. if not, recheck the console to make sure that it is set to 720p. Also make sure to check that the plugs you are using are the inputs for the blackmagic and not the output plugs.
if you do get an image in media express, open up xsplit, add the source and it should come up.